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Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Okay, So  
I didn't finish going off my Paxil. Going from 10mg to zero is too big a step. I felt like my brain was trying to escape from my skull and, when it couldn't, spent its time trying to turn itself inside out. I was having hot and cold flashes. It was terrible. I had my husband cut a pill in half, so I took 5 mg and I've been doing that since. It's still a bit unpleasant - I always feel like I just stood up too fast or like I'm a bit drunk - but much better. This I can tolerate. When I last saw my doctor and we discussed this she mentioned that I might need to ramp down to 5 before quitting. I'm seeing her in 2 weeks to assess my meds. I'm thinking maybe I should switch to a different SSRI instead of quitting altogether. I like being on them and I'm not so sure I'm ready to fly without my magic feather, to use an ill-advised Disney metaphor. The reasons I wanted to go off the Paxil were to allow for pregnancy (although there's nothing to contraindicate) and to stop the weight gain. But it's not as though pregnancy is imminent. I'm still not sure I want kids at all; I keep vacillating. So really it's just the weight gain. And in that case I might as well switch my meds instead of quitting altogether.